Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Bloggus Interruptus

I beg your pardon for the interruption in my normal blog-havior, but in either a moment of extreme paranoia, self-doubt, or simple curiosity, I find myself driven to ask this question:


I know for a fact that at least three people read my blog regularly. One, of course, is Ron who says he frequently learns new things about me. That makes sense, since when we spend time together, I’m usually in a pussy, a mouth, an ass, or his hand. And in those cases, respectively, he knows that I’m thinking: “more lube please”, “please god no teeth”, “thank god she wipes”, and “just like the old days!”

There’s a sweet woman named Penney—a diehard Taylor Hicks fan--who often posts comments to my blogs, so I know she’s reading.

And then there’s my agent, Sid who—despite being 97 and in a coma—gets the blog read to him every morning by his nurse, Frieda, who tells me that Sid never responds to my words, but that she frequently masturbates to them.

And that’s it!

Or at least—that’s all that I know about. And so dear readers (if there are, in fact, any), I am putting out a simple request. Let me know that you’re there. That you read me. That you care. You can do this in three ways. You can reply to this posting. You can write me directly at:, or you can send me a tweet if you’re on Twitter (@ronsmonster).

For decades, I’ve had thousands of women show me love. And it’s not like I have any plans to quit my day job. But after years of sharing my seed, I must say I’ve come to love sharing my thoughts.

So in the immortal words of Pink Floyd:

Hello, hello, hello…is there anybody out there?
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